...one of those days...

Do you ever have one of those days? You know the kind....

One of those days when the overwhelming weight of the world just seems to be bearing all of its deep gravity well down on you? When all of the culpability of the species just seems to be unfucking avoidable and you have to own it, hold it to you at the same time that you're trying to tear it out of you?

One of those days when you can't resist to the urge to take on the sins of your race, your country, your gender, your species? When every story, every song, every image reminds you of the incredible fuck up this all is, all of it, in spite of the good things, because of the unmitigated horror of the bad?

When the black hole is so dense that it's hard out get out of bed, off of the floor, out the door? When the sunlight hurts and smiles feel like razorblades? When the thought of peace, the ephemeral unlikelihood of it, the whisper of its possibility and the truth of its goddamn improbability, reduces you to tears?

When you want to slap every child you see push another down, ram your car into every self-involved driver that didn't see the person they almost ran over, strangle every self-serving politician you watch lie, again and again and again, destroy every person that ever hit their spouse in anger, knowing the whole time that it's the wrong answer to every one of those situations and not caring?

Knowing that even if you could, the shame would just be worse afterward?

One of those days when you can't see the hope through the fear, or the love through the hate, or the intelligence through the ignorance? When bigotry seems to be the rule and tolerance – not even real acceptance, just tolerance – looks like it's about a million fucking light years away from being possible?

When laughter makes you want to cry, crying makes you want to scream, and honesty makes you want to smash every mirror in the world?

One of those days? Do you know the kind I'm talking about?

I'm having one.

Sometimes it's good to just sit in awe and fucking own it for a day.

S'okay though. It's just a day. Tomorrow's a new one, and things'll be better. It's just one day.

For Gaza

Let me state this plainly:

I am not anti-Israel. I believe that Israel has a right to exist as valid as any other nation state. I don't know if I would have made the same choices that were made in the late 1940's, but that's water under the bridge. Israel exists and has a right to continue to exist.

I am not pro-Palestine. I believe that the nation state is one of the poorer inventions of the human species. Show me a nation-state and I will show you an institution that will want something that someone else possesses, and will fight and kill for it if they get the opportunity.

I am not anti-Israeli. The Israeli people are a vibrant and dynamic culture with much to offer the world.

I am not pro-Hamas. Hamas, as much as the nation-state of Israel, has many crimes to answer for. I do not condone or approve of terrorism or violence no matter how much I might understand the frustration and anger that spawns it.

What I am is anti-Israeli government and policy in so much as that government and policy considers it justifiable to marginalize 1.5 million people and dictate their quality of life so that it is, at best, an existence of bare subsistence.

I am pro-Palestinian. Palestinians are a people. Like the Israelis, they have a vibrant and dynamic culture to share with the world. Like the Israelis, they deserve the opportunity to exist and flourish.

I am pro-Gaza. It is for the 1.5 million citizens of Gaza that my heart aches, that my teeth grind, that my fists clench.

They are impoverished for no reason other than an arrogant belief that one people are more worthy than another; denied the rights that we consider most basic because one culture has decreed they are less worthy; refused the basic goods required to build their homes and feed their children because a group of developed nations have decided that it is justifiable to punish an entire people for what they consider to be the sin of  poor democratic choice.

The international community of nations tout themselves as wise statesmen acting in the best interest of humanity, but they are not. Rather, they are bullies, the largest and most immature children in the playground vying for control of a global sandbox. They do not speak for me. They do not speak for you. They speak for themselves and those economic concerns that promise them fame, power and fortune.

I am anti-bully. Bullies steal from others so that they can grow fatter and bigger. They beat up those that they can to feel powerful in a vain attempt to prove their arrogance justifiable. They say that they are protecting us, but really it's more like a protection racket, an organized crime. All this can be yours,, they say, if you will just shut up and follow the program.

We cannot shut up. In the name of all of those values that our rulers give lip service to but never honor, in the name of true morals like empathy and justice and equality, in the name of simple dignity, we cannot shut up.

Instead we must remember the weak, embrace those who have been cast out and called unclean, stand up for those who cannot, dissent from the lie of the status quo. If we will not stand now for those who are beaten down, who will stand for us when we are the slaves, the marginalized, the disenfranchised?

There must be a better way, and if our 'leaders' will not seek it, then we are the ones that must demand it with more conviction, more peace, more resolve. Our leaders must be made to remember. And for that to happen, we cannot forget.

Gaza, we remember you. And we will not forget. Or rest.

“What should move us to action is human dignity: the inalienable dignity of the oppressed, but also the dignity of each of us. We lose dignity if we tolerate the intolerable.” Dominique de Menil

(Things are busy right now so blog posts will be a bit inconsistent for a week or two (if you didn’t notice by now)… if anyone is still reading. J)

Edmund Burke is often misquoted as saying that, ‘All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing’. Burke didn’t actually say this, although it does echo some of his thoughts. But I digress…

Our world is full of atrocities. Genocide in Burma and Darfur (to mention a couple); corporate crimes against humanity through sweat shops, pollution, fraud, etc.; totalitarianism and the support dictators receive from our own governments and our banks; people giving each other the finger for some perceived slight on the drive into the city… the list could be very long. In a world full of laws, jurisprudence and litigiousness, justice is an ephemeral commodity. When it happens, it seems to be either an accident or the result of another crime. Dignity seems somewhat scarce at times.

It can be overwhelmingly depressing to think about, mostly because, since we were all kids, we’ve been taught that there’s nothing we can really do about it. We are raised to feel powerless over everything except, perhaps, our own little corner of the world, the one that exists between the walls of our home. We’re led to believe that, if we can just create that little piece of the world that is just ours, that safe, private place, then everything else can go to hell and it will be okay. We’ll be okay, us and ours, safe in our little cocoons.

Of course we’re capable of so much more. We see examples of it everyday; people who extend themselves and accomplish amazing things that nobody ever really thought could be done: Terry Fox, or that father that pushes and pulls his disabled son through triathlons, or Gandhi, or King., or Mother Theresa. They move us deeply, displaying the kind of dedication and selflessness that only heroes are capable of.

These giants would tell you that we are all capable of being heroes too. Einstein said that our responsibility as humans, in the time that we are given, is to learn to stretch out our arms to include the world rather than hide in our safe little box. That, ‘…our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.’

You know - just that. That’s all…

The thought seems daunting to me, but I remember: One step at a time. I don’t ever anticipate that I will do anything as meaningful or special as some of the true heroes of the world have done, but I can start with what’s in front of me. I can start to widen my circle of compassion. Who knows where I’ll end up if I take it one day at a time, right?

Ask most people and they will agree that the world is in trouble. Some consider it a little bit of trouble, the kind that can be solved by electing the right party next time around. Others consider it to be in a lot of trouble on a scale that requires a good old-fashioned revolution. Wherever we lie on the spectrum of concern this quote will either strike a harmonic chord with how we feel or, if we only think the trouble meter is at ‘low’, perhaps prompt a modicum more thought on the subject. Either way, wherever each of us happens to be, surely there’s no harm in widening our circles of compassion individually - just a bit.

Allowing a person a sense of dignity is such an easy thing to do: It just requires that we acknowledge them as a person, as a human being. Maybe we open a door for a random stranger at the mall instead of hurdling them to get in first. Perhaps it could mean stopping to talk to the guy on the street that we usually ignore or throw a buck at. It could mean talking to the person that always, always sits across the aisle, alone like you, on the train or the bus during the commute. And there are always plenty of opportunities to volunteer.

If we all committed to the task of allowing one person their dignity in some small but meaningful way each day; if we all took seriously the responsibility of widening our circle of compassion just an inch by the time we went to bed; if we all just took one little step and then followed it up with another one, how quickly do you think we might find that our circles overlap?

Maybe we can’t all be heroes on the scale of a Gandhi or King or a Mother Theresa, but how much more could we do if we all did a small thing together?

Could the combined aggregate tiny good of six billion or so people make an impact on a scale that rivals the massive heroism of one of the icons mentioned above? How about ten percent of that six billion? Or one percent? If we could pull that off, maybe we could get back some of the dignity that the human race has relinquished by standing by so often.

Just one little step today, and another tomorrow, and another the day after that, not worrying about what anyone else is doing; just me; just you; just a bit more than yesterday. I wonder where it might lead…

"Where is there dignity unless there is honesty?" Cicero (106 BC - 43 BC)

The statement is pretty clear and straight forward. No argument made by Cicero here in support of his assertion – he makes this statement as if it is a self-evident truth, one I happen to agree with and that most people would have a hard time arguing against. Honesty, after all, is a value and virtue that we still hold aloft in principal if not in practice.

To me though, that our culture still does praise the virtues of honesty seems a bit hypocritical. We live in the age of persuasion, after all, when the ability to manipulate opinion, coerce agreement, ‘win friends and influence people’, and make a hard sale seem to be qualities that we praise above the more ‘traditional’ virtues. 

I’d go so far as to say that dishonesty is the more valued attribute in our day and age, provided you can be profitably dishonest and not get caught. We still love to hang the dishonest villain out to dry if they get themselves caught, but while they are raking in profits or basking in the limelight, we praise that kind of ambition and drive.

By Cicero’s standard there’s an awful lot of undignified behavior today, just as there was in his time, but also like in Cicero’s time, we are the only species on the face of the planet that can consciously aspire to refute dishonesty, to stand apart from the kind of win-at-all-costs and avoid-responsibility mentality that makes it possible to rationalize dishonesty as a legitimate choice of action.

Honesty pays the kind of dividends that dishonest dealings can never provide: honest and humble pride, a sense of honor and the aspiration of nobility of character. Old fashioned concepts perhaps, but the kind that can still apply in a modern and changing world if we make the choice to prioritize them. What kind of world would we be able to make for ourselves if enough people chose honesty and dignity, not as replacements for profitability and success, but as the measure of them?